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What does it mean when a man says he’s confused?

Question:

What does it mean when a man says he’s confused???

The man I was very interested in tells me he’s confused about us. He calls me every day (many times) and we see each other, kiss, talk cute etc. Yet, he keeps saying that he’s confused and doesn’t want to hurt me (we were but now have not been having sex).

He also has been very touchy and everything I say he says I am telling him he’s an asshole (I’ve never used those words) and I feel like I’m walking on eggshells.

I haven’t asked for a committment...is that what he’s thinking? I think he’s in love with me and scared to death of me becuase I can see through him.

Also, he’s out of work which I think may make him feel very insecure.

What do you think??? Should I continue to hang around him or tell him to call me when he’s not confused? PLEASE, PLEASE HELP!!!

Answer:

He’s confused? I’m confused. I’m confused as to why a normal, healthy, adult woman would put up with a loser like this. All he does is take his frustrations out on you, and you allow him to. That’s the key here. You’re allowing him to do it. Which means you can stop him from doing it.

From what you’ve told me, all you’re doing is compromising your self respect. The man does not exist who is worth compromising your self respect for. He never did, he doesn’t now and he never will.

Why would you waste your time on a man who has so little respect for you?

So the question is not, "Should I continue to hang around him or tell him to call me when he’s not confused?" The question is, "Why would you waste your time on a man who has so little respect for you?"

This can only continue to go down hill. He’s confused, frustrated and angry... and there is nothing you can do about it except walk away with your self respect intact. It’s not your fault he’s in the position he’s in so stop letting him take it out on you.

The most important thing in any relationship is your self respect. Once you compromise that, your dignity, integrity and everything else goes down the drain and you end up being a door mat to the other person. One of the most important rules I teach my students is, "Never compromise your self respect for any reason".

What are you getting out of this relationship besides a bad time? What do you want from him? Whatever it is, you’re obviously not getting it because he’s incapable of giving it to you.

Should you hang around? Why? What’s in it for you aside from abuse? Just walk away and find another guy who can appreciate what you have to offer, a guy who won’t take his frustrations out on you.

You deserve better than this. Give yourself permission to have a loving relationship. Until you do that, you’ll never find it.

What does it mean when a man says he’s confused? It means he’s not the guy for you.

Good luck and God Bless.